5 Great “Mean-Girl” monologues for teens: Comedy with a sharp edge!

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You don’t have to be auditioning for Mean Girls on Broadway to appreciate these monologues. For teens, or young adults, looking to show off their cutting, yet comedic side, these monologues are great for auditions, competitions, and performances. These monologues are funny and, well, kind of mean, operating under the layered humor I find interesting: show your self-absorption and cruelty under the guise of being nice. Check out these monologues about friendships, dance class, high-heeled shoes, Calculus and more!

Five (5) Unique “Mean-Girl” Monologues Great for Teens:

  • A Really Good Reason:
    Here, our alpha-mean-girl has to let go of a friendship, for a very alpha-mean-girl type reason.
    (Around 1.5-2 minutes)

  • F for Friendship:
    So, this is a kind of “mean-girl having revenge on a mean-girl” situation…
    (Around 1 minute)

  • She’s So Ugly:
    Find out how Skyler plans to help the “ugly” girl in dance class.
    (Around 1 minute)
    Haircuts for Hannah is a 30-second adapted version of She’s So Ugly.

  • Not Just Derivatives and Functions or Whatever:
    Does insulting another girl and complimenting yourself make you a better catch to a boy you like? Hmmm… Oh, and yeah, remember Calculus?
    (Around 2 minutes)

  • Freshly Squeezed:
    Ruth is a 1940s housewife who simply can’t help being the best at everything!
    (Around 1.5 minutes)

*BONUS: Wanna play the nice girl who’s had enough of the mean girl? Check out:

Those Jimmy Choo Shoes:
Sarah is not a mean girl herself—but she has been pushed too far by resident “mean girl,” Madison! So Sarah finds a different use for those expensive Jimmy Choo shoes of Madison’s… and winds up in the principal’s office.
(Around 1 minute)

Amanda’s Monologue from, What Happened at the Mud Puddle:
Amanda is new to middle school and it doesn’t take long for mean-girl Taylor to humiliate her in front of the whole cafeteria. So why does Amanda still want to go to Taylor’s party?
(around 2 minutes)